Breaking News

Good evening and tonights main headline:
Today is a dark day for humanity as the ongoing negotations between allied and ant forces broke down and open hostilities commenced in ernest. After several days of open negotiations and non violent restrictions the heat in the region has finally reched boiling point (especially becuse the radiator is on). At approximatly 1300 hours local time a large enemy troop formation was detected in the region surrounding the windowsill, an allied response was immediate with a areial chemical strike (lynx deoderant) however the strike acheived only mild effects with a dispertion of the formation and limited retreat, physical force was also uneffective and by 1400 the area was firmly under ant control, since that time ant scout and skirmishing parties have been spotted in the desk and carpet areas and there are rumours that also in the bed region, this is confirmed by the allied's increased readiness to evacuate this area should it become overrun. This offensive has caught the allies at bad time with local chemical weapons stocks at a minimum, however action has been taken to remove all forage from the carpet area and the bin has been relocated. It is unknown what this offensive is in aid off although negotiations had been stalemated, an allied response at this time would seem to be inadvisable especially with the exact enemy numbers and locations unknown due to their prevalent use of guerrilla tunnels. Experts are already saying that this could well be another vietnam.
In other news; scientists have warned that a weekend study indicates a combination of guiness, kronenberg, hoegarden and carling followed by red wine can lead to the formation of severe hangovers, also side effects of loud discussions on precognition, attempting to set up an illuminati and sending stupid text messages were observed.
On the lighter side of the news: Two atoms accidently walked in to each other in the street, the first one said "sorry about that mate, are you all right?", the other replies "no i've gone and lost an electron", First atom: "are you sure" , Second atom: " Yes, I'm positive".
Finally in todays poll run by blog24/7 asks "is Andy reading to much into the claim that blogs will be the way we receive news in the future?", initial results are; Yes: 2%, No: 2% and Who's Andy: 96%

Forbidden Cola

Who'd have guessed it following on from several days of freezing winds and general coldness, which also involved lots of moaning about when spring was coming and suddenly its summer with t-shirt weather and that cut grass smell. Shame it has to be spent inside chained to my desk finishing the last of my coursework (ever) and then starting the daunting task of writing a 20000+ word dissertation in 2 weeks. another fortelling of summer was the begining of the ant invasion into my room, hopefully i can train them to tidy up my room whilst i'm busy but if not then they will feel the wrath of DDT.

Well with the coming of a bit of heat all i needed was the refreshment of a nice can of coke, although the problem was encoutered that the vending machine would take all of my money until i was 10p short of a can and then reject every other coin, a visit to the campus shop also failed to gin me a drink, so fearing some divinly influence not to drink coke i visited my last machine only for it to take my money but not be in sevice. Oh the excitment i constantly live in!

Tomorrow brings my last ever lectures and me with already having to sort of graduation stuff, it just brings into perspective just how fast this year has gone. In fact at harvs birthday dinner on friday (which i did drink red wine but later spoiled it with several st paddys day guinesses) myself, sion and jane where remenising how short ago it seems when we were all in wellington. Well the counter ticks down once again giving me 3 months to sort eveything out, including the biggest leaving bash ever.

Finally i have decided that dragonforce are a band for every occasion (especially if you have a spare 8 minutes to listen to a song) and journalists and sion should not be trusted to express their opinion on pesticide/cancer links.

Dehydrated decision

Ok so over one week i've managed to reduce my required essays from 12000 words to a measly 1500, but since its a boring story involving my laptop, busy afternoons, a speed metal/ prog rock band called dragonforce and for some reason eating my way through half a roll of kitchen paper, i shall spare you it.
Instead i'll share my latest concern, the story arises from my recent drought of beer (a beer famine) as the benefits of having 2 pints a night are outweighed by the ruining of the rest of the evening and the gaining of a beer belly.
So now beer is on the decrease (although i am drinking a can whilst typing this) what do i drink instead.
1.Coke, a nice tasty beverage which makes a good evening drink, however every time i drink it i seem to bereminded of the already poor state of affairs my teeth are in(no dentist in 4 years and a 4m fall onto concrete) and since i dont particulary want them to fall out ( and the pub doesnt stock diet or no sugar brands) i can't really be drinking 2 pints of it an evening.
2. Coffee, my other addicition, as much as i've tried i can't not drink coffee, even though it gives my migraines. Due to the stress this week coffee consumtion has increased with on average 5 cups a day, although i think i'm entering a vicious circle with my already small sleeping pattern of 7 hours getting shorter and thus i need more caffine in the morning. It took 3 cups to get me going this morning and then i only did 1 hours work and now its 6.30pm i'm finally awake. Therefore if i want to avoid becoming my brother ( a terminal lazy bastard/ vampire goth) i cant replace beer with coffee.
3. Tea, i have no teabags except fancy crap tasting anti hangover ones.
4. Water, i think although the healthiest option i might commit suicide if forced to drink unflavoured water for any other reason than to rehydrate after being drunk.

So whats the answer then, suprisingly enough red wine
the benfits of it are that it is'nt full of rubbish, is relativly cheap,two glasses a day is good for the heart, i have some tolerance to getting drunk on it (although i do remember a night where it started the downfall to a broken wrist) and finally with my current reading of war and peace (i'm at page 190 and by god those french are sneaky)and my fancy new clothes it makes me look very classy (or dapper some might say).
Well tonight should prove the deciding value as i'm heading to Harvs belated birthday meal and plan to forgo the beer and have a house red. I'm sure however that come tomorrow due to red wine causing hangover reasons i'll be forced to conced that beer is best.

Finally this video almost killed sion through laughing so hard:
Reptile attack

Back in Action

Well 12 days should be enough time to digest the magnificence of the last entry and to be able to recover from the coolness of me in my arctic gear.
unfortunately there hasn't been a huge amount of action going on. Attempting to write 12000 words of essays has for some reason eclipsed my normal (but still boring) life. In fact I'm only writing this because I'm frustrated about the lack of references to phosphine poisoning.

Last week I suddenly decided that my wardrobe needed a boost , this was partly because I've been wearing the same fleece all winter and my shoes decided to loose their soles. Cue a £50 online shop and i have a new outfit including a cool new jacket, A short trip later into guildford and I'm armed with a cool pair of smart trainers and a copy of Leo Tolstoy's War and Peace (Andy goes Classical). Where did this money come from you might ask,i am after all a very poor student, could it be I've found a sugar daddy. Well the explanation was quite a handy surprise, after some amazing marks for my year in NZ i ended up with 84% overall performance, which by miles was enough to see me as the best PTY student (much better than that lazy sion) and subsequently be awarded the Linda Eteen Memorial Prize of £75. (Chalk it up), Or so i hope as I've already spent it!
Last Saturday marked a rare occurrence, after an afternoon of drinking whilst watching the rugby (and Scotland lose) it was decided to actually go out, so 6 beers later we hit the rock club, Sion who drinks in dog beers was really wasted and spent a lot of the night chatting up a lesbian, whilst i took to the pit and pulled some great skanking moves with my new trainers.

Well things are starting to happen with NZ so now i have to fufil my side of the bargain and get a 2:1 (damn).

Had a big rant about how the poisons cabinet in my project lab hasn't been locked for a month now, and then promptely explained how i was naturally muscley and it was nothing to do with the reems of steroids stored there. Seriuosly would you trust an open poisons cabinet in my hands (mad laughing). Note to Law - Big "in" joke ok!

I hav'nt updated on any tunes lately and i know everyone who reads this must trust me with bringing great music into there lives, so go listen to "surfer girl" by homegrown or failing that "Hotel California" by the Eagles (now on my repetoire for my guitar)

Gone fishin!

A week ago in a place not so far far away....

And so it began with being able to tempt sion to join me at the union, the promise of goth girls to eye up all night thanks to the metal soceity having its monthly clube proved just the bait.
The night began with several beers in the campus "hip" pub, followed by heading back to mine to finish my xmas bottle of JD and several more beers, this of course also involved the compulsory put the stupid shirts from my warderobe on and attempt to play along to every song on the media player shuffle.

After sion spending an hour sorting himself something to wear out of my limited supply of clean clothes(t-shirts don't need ironing) we headed out into the cold and hit the union. Things went blurry for the next 5 hours then suddenly i'm queing up for a kebab i don't want.

5 hours later i'm rudely interupted by my dad as he comes to pick us up for a weekend of fishing, 45 minutes of trying to not be sick later i'm sat eating the greasiest bacon sandwich ever in a portsmouth cafe. Hangovers on the way out its time for the grand fishoff to begin, to the winner a free beer off the rest. Wandering down the seafront to the chosen fishing spot you just might think it was a beautiful sunny day, until you realise theres about a -30C windchill factor.

Cue an arctic wrapup later and i'm ready to invade russia. Tackle ready and baited up by Sion (i can't stand worms) i'm fishin. First catch goes to Sion with a nasty little spiky fish.

However his taunts did'nt last long as totally by luck (seeing any bites with the strongwinds was impossible) i haul from the depths a monster flatfish (see below)

Several hours later with our faces eroded from the winds and all the fish buggered off to france we give up, as late cures for the hangovers we go to the bar and also catch the rugby, how Sion survived in that pub full of english supporters i don't know. A nice curry and more beers later (which victory boy sion could'nt hold in) and its back to the hotel.

Day 2:

Another early start and i'm begining to regret leaving my bed the day before, we move down the seafront next to the amusment arcades, a couple of games on the fruit machines later and we're back fishing.

After the obligatory take the edge of the hangover beer

Still no letup in the wind however but its looking promising for fish, unfortunatly the most action that happens for that day is that i fall off the pier wallDefeated we head back for a couple more games of tuppeny shove and then back to guilford to catch up on 20 hours of missed sleep. On arrival back i'm looking forward to that nice hot shower , well they won't be letting me into heaven anymore after my language on finding that the hot water boilers broke (and still is).

Thus ends tonights tale.

Say Cheese!

This post is only an intermedate post before my big one tomorrow about the weekend.
After carrying a camera around for the last month i finally decided to fork out the £7 to have it processed, the one with all my weekend photos gets finished tomorrow but i have lots of great piccies of me looking stupid. So unfortuatly since they are all related to previous enteries your all going to have to scroll back if you want to see them. Might give that scroll wheel finger some exercise. Although for those without fingers heres a brief description of me and things

This picture is of me looking my most suave, unfortunatly i don't look this good all the time.

Sometimes i look better!

My chosen place of work the university of surrey, this building is known as titanic(as are the uni's policies)

Typical british weather means you have to wear several layers to go swimming in the uni lake (including an ice pick)